Less-Troublesome Tuesday

Woo-HOO for a good weigh in! This week I managed a loss of 2.8 (a typical loss for me), for a total loss of 3.0 lbs. I worked the program more this week, but I made some adjustments to my attitudes and thoughts. It feels SO good to finally be seeing a downward spike.

The cool thing is that this loss is in spite of some Valentine candy indiscretion. Woo-HOO! I didn't allow it to stress me out, or derail me.

I managed to get in a bunch of fruits and veggies each day, and now I'm close to getting all five servings in daily. I *really* like that under the new WW Points Plus TM system fruits are 0 pts, and most veggies are 0 or very low (this excludes potatoes). I'm consistently getting in 3 bottles of water (16.9 oz) daily, and don't know if I can manage much more than that. I used to try to get in four, and was SO miserable running to the bathroom every 45 minutes. Ugh. I don't even want to think about it.

Exercise. I gotz it. I've been taking Nick and Linc on nice, long trail hikes (pictured) and both they and I have been having a ball. The major problem is that at the moment there's not enough daylight before or after I get home from work to get a walk in. So I've been looking around, and have found a lovely little wooded trail about 15 mins from work. So today I have dogs with, and during my lunch hour we'll go take a hike. I'll only be able to get a 30 min hike in, but that's 30 minutes we wouldn't have gotten otherwise. My thought is that I can at least get all three of us in better shape if I make the effort.

My exercise goals for the week are:

1. One dog walk during the week, and one or two on the weekend (the weekend walks are usually 2-1/2 hours or so). Next week I'll aim for TWO walks during the week.

2. Go to Zumba class this week. I've never been, but my sister promises me that there are other fat girlz there, so I'm planning to go tomorrow. I'm a bit skeered. I hate trying new things like this. I might call my brother's girlfriend and see if she'll go too. I'll admit I often feel guilty doing things during the week because the dogs are crated so much now (I work 30 mins from home). But I'm going to sacrifice one night during the week.

Food goals:

1. Continue on my water and fruit trend.
2. Cook more - at least two nights this week.

Anyone else who cares to chime in is welcome to...

Stupid Scale

Stupid Scale. It hates me. While I'm on the subject, I hate it too. So I'm up .2 from last week, which at a WW meeting would be considered a "maintain". I'm not sure why, but in some reality I expected my seven miles of walking last week to result in like... a ten pound weight loss. Ha!

So what have I learned? I'm going to have to work the program. I've been sort of doing it my way the last three or so weeks, and while I've managed to maintain I'm certainly not gaining any ground on losing. I have GOT to set myself up to succeed, and instead I'm farting around and setting myself up to fail. Plus that stupid scale hates me.

I've been following my rules this past week - more water, more fruits and veggies. I have, through process of elimination, learned that even yogurt sets off my lactose intolerance, though not as bad as some other things. It is bearable on occasion, but as an every day thing I can't do it. I NEED to eat breakfast, so I'm going back to English Muffins and peanut butter. I've always wondered... what do the English call English Muffins? Muffins? Then what do they call a muffin?

Anyway, so I'm going to try this week to get closer to plan. I sorta got all cheaty on myself a few times with the tracking... I fell into the whole, "well I ate so many of ____ that I just won't track it". So my goals this week:

1. Eat three fruits and/or veggies a day (uh... that's really up from like none a few weeks ago)
2. Drink 3 bottles of water (that will equal my 6/8oz per day)
3. Track it all. No buts. Even if I find myself in a major suckage situation

I have had some good moments this week - I've chosen wisely in a few situations, so power to me on that.

Refusal

So today was supposed to be my weigh in day. The fact that I wrote "supposed to be" is indeed a bad sign. This is me heaving a gigantic sigh. I weighed this morning, and the 2.5 lbs I had as a loss the last few days had vanished. Not only that, but I was actually UP freaking .8 from last week's weigh in. This just is not possible!

I protest.

I'm allowed to protest. It is my scale. In my house. If I'm going to strip to me skivvies to weigh I insist I maintain the power to protest.

I'm also constipated. Well I was this morning. I won't go into all of that though. In fact, I've probably already gone way too far, but too late to back it up now.

I'm going to weigh again tomorrow morning, and I promise that weight will go on the books, regardless of what it is. Girl Scout's Honor. I'm even holding up two fingers. Or three. I can't remember which it is. But seriously, tomorrow I will be back to post of my loss... or gain. It better not be a gain. Or else.

Yo-Yo Queen

How's this for motivation? OMG. You could park a truck across my arse.

Sometimes I'm just SO sick of myself and the trends/habits I allow for myself. It appears that I am the queen of following a program, and then the queen of going all wild and crazy and throwing caution to the wind. Why is it SO hard to find a middle ground? Why do I always find so much guilt, and either let it rule me, or live in denial to it?

I don't know. But I just feel so strongly that I have GOT to find my way. I'm not sure what that is, really, but I've got to find it. I really admire those women who either a. don't think about this stuff, or b. only ever have five pounds to lose.

I don't know that I'll ever belong to the women of group a. but I'd love to be one of the women in group b. When I keep finding myself facing 60, 70, or 80 lbs to lose suddenly being 5 lbs over goal seems like no big deal. I need to find a way to look at it all as if it's no big deal, and just DO it.

I finally got up the gumption to track my weight in the WW Online tracker two or three weeks ago. I tracked again last week, down .2. I then lost two to three pounds due to vertigo (ugh, no fun), but as soon as I started eating again there it was. Again.

So I've made a few very small changes. Last night I chose leftover steak, broccoli salad, and egg noodles with a splash of EVOO and spices over PIZZA. I'm craving some pizza, and may need to have some. But last night I was craving protein and veggies, and so that's what I had. I marked my start weight two weeks ago, and I'm working on finding ways to live with myself. One of these is that I've made steps towards getting the dogs out for trail walks. They love it, I love it, and they'll be in much better shape come trial season than they have been. They'd better get in shape because they'll be working at Robin's trials in March and April.

So here are my few small changes:

1. Back to tracking. Even if it's abysmal.

2. Two bottles of water daily.

3. One or two fruits/veggies daily.

4. Dog walks - at least two a week. For now.

I'm planning to start Zumba with my sister, but I've got to get a few pounds off first.

Now, for the good news. In all of this floundering around I still have not gained back all of the weight I'd previously lost. This is something for me, because my usual pattern is lose it, gain it, and then some.

So here's to getting back on the horse, even if it's just a pony!